gut feeling


The running question seems to be “So, How do you feel?” Prior to today my answers have been excited, nervous, proud, accomplished, fulfilled and blessed. However, today as I flipped through the book I stopped on the dedication page and tears immediately filled my eyes. I finally know how to answer the question. The most prevalent feeling is the feeling of freedom. I found freedom in my truth! As ridiculous as this may sound, I found freedom in falling short. I found freedom in breaking free from the weight of feeling like I had to prove others wrong about me. I found freedom in releasing myself from the pressure of living the life my parents wanted for me. I found freedom in realizing that I don’t have to be a perfectly polished Christian to make a difference. I found freedom! I found freedom by simply letting go! I let go of the pressure of perfection.

The pressure to be perfect is real! The pressure of feeling as if you’re not expected to make mistakes is real. The pressure of living up to the unrealistic expectations set for you is real! Not only is it real, it is extremely restraining. Writing ‘Gut Feeling’ was my way of alleviating the pressure and breaking free! In breaking free, I found myself. I found my voice. I found a new passion for life. And more importantly I found God on a deeper level. I learned that you don’t have to be perfect for God to use you. I learned that you take your power back by refusing to allow the shame of your sin to keep you silent. I learned that scars are great conversation starters and the ones that you’re most embarrassed by have the power to stop someone from making the same mistakes. I learned that there’s freedom in embracing your flaws and His grace is sufficient even when you fall! I learned that I was free to be me!

“To the perfectly imperfect girls, dealing with the overwhelming pressure to be perfect. Living in a world where people judge others by what they did, but judge themselves by what they intended. Here’s to jumping off the pedestal and having the opportunity to learn from our mistakes. Here’s to the perfect girls we weren’t and the perfectly forgiven women we became. This book is dedicated to you; poised, powerful and far from perfect!”


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